Golden Globes Red Carpet: Version Underachiever
Okay, last Golden Globes post, I promise. I’m getting a little sick of it myself, but I can’t let these slide. These underachievers of fashion, these stars who have so much potential and somehow squandered it. For example, Beyonce was exactly as badly dressed as I expected her to be. Salma Hayek, not so much.
I was bitterly disappointed by this. She’s stupidly beautiful, there is no doubt about that. She could wear an old sheet and still be doable. Unfortunately, it looks like she did. This dress, while lovely, does nothing for her. She actually looks kind of thick, here, and not in a juicy voluptuous way, but in a tree-trunk way.
If you had asked me on Sunday, I would have said Cameron Diaz could wear anything. She’s tall and thin and has that kind of unselfconscious happiness about her that usually renders weird clothes wearable. Usually. Actually, I might like this dress, if she would allow me to rip that rogue tutu off her shoulder and feed it to the garbage disposal. Thing is giving me itchy fingers.
Before you squawk, I love the dress. Chic, chic, chic. I mean, way to rock the teeny waist, right? It’s the hair I’m not so crazy about. When you’ve got a forehead and a half, as I do (an ex-boyfriend once referred to it as a “six-head”), as Hilary does, hairstyles that extend it even further skyward are to be avoided. I mean, ponder her head for a moment. You could project movies on that forehead. Great dress, great hairpiece, even, but bad, bad hair.
These are all gorgeous ladies, and I have no doubt they will more than redeem themselves at the Oscars. But they’re on probation. Seriously, ladies, I’m watching. One more thick-waisted/rogue frilled/forehead emphasizing outfit, and we’re through.
Golden Globes 2007, Golden Globes Red Carpet, Golden Globes Red Carpet Fashion, Fashion Police, Fashion Reviews, Salma Hayek, Cameron Diaz, Hilary Swank
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